WHY DO WE RESIST CHANGE?

"Change is the Law of the Universe." 

This is amongst my favourite  lines from the Bhagwad Gita.

Most of us, or rather all of us have a certain resistance to change whether it be around us or inside us. Oh, we would be happy if  things or people did change around us as per our expectations, which by the way are very different from one moment to another! We are not happy when things change around us without our having any say in it and we are definitely not happy when we realize that we need to or are asked to change. 

“I am like this.”

“ At my age, I cannot change.”

“ This is me, it is my character, I cannot change.”

“You can’t expect me to change now. I can’t.”

Ever heard that from someone you know? Maybe from yourself?  We usually confuse our habits and behaviour with our personality.

We forget that everything is in a state of constant flux, ever evolving, ever changing and we too keep changing even if we think we are the same. Our circumstances and experiences shape us bit by bit, take us further despite our resistance. Sometimes the changes are dramatic and most often traumatic because we seek security and comfort in the known. We resist with all our strength and are usually miserable during the process. It takes time to come to terms with new circumstances and situations but come to terms we must. 

Another little Law states that WHAT WE RESIST, PERSISTS. Resistance to change prolongs our unhappiness, we feel trapped and cannot seem to find a way out. Things begin to settle down only once we surrender and accept willingly or unwillingly that we cannot fight any more. When we allow something Greater than us to take over, the transformation begins.

Our resistance keeps us from experiencing the beauty of change, it keeps us from welcoming a change for the better with Joy in our hearts. 

Is change always for the better? What if it is change for the worse?

The question here is, “What can we really do to control it, whether for the better or for the worse?” In the end, we have to accept it anyhow and it makes sense to make the most of it. So eventually, we can ensure that it is for the better. We can keep on lamenting that things have changed for the worse but that is only going to pull us down more. Why not embrace change positively and with optimism so we can decide to a certain degree how to go about it rather than being pushed around by the currents of change without any direction? 

We wish to control our lives, the circumstances that shape our experiences but we cannot. With all the willpower and all our force and strength, we can plan and intend to the best of our ability and follow through but we know that we cannot have all things go as per our expectations. There will be something not quite as we had imagined and we allow this to throw us off track.

What we can control is how we react to the unexpected that life throws at us and how fast we react determines how fast we will get out of the whirlpool of indecision, unhappiness, turbulent emotions which hold us to ransom and a general state of confusion. 

Let us open our minds to change and decide what to do about it, how to use it to our best interest, to shape our destiny with our own hands. Taking this a step further, let us BE THE CHANGE we have been looking forward to. Let us start within ourselves and simply BE just a bit better, kinder, fitter, smarter, brighter, nicer than we have been so far…

“I am like this now. I can be what I want when I want”

“ At my age, I can change and help others change.”

“ This is me, it is my character, I have the power, I can change.”

“You can’t expect me to be static now. I am living and vibrant and ever changing.”

How does that sound? To me it sounds extremely Powerful!

Let us begin to harness change to our wellbeing and share the progress and help others come forward.

We owe it to ourselves and to those around us!